Although another chapter in my life has come to a close, and a new one is about to begin, the end of summer seemed rather anticlimactic. Right now although I am driving down to Pittsburgh to begin college at Carnegie Mellon, it doesn't really feel like I'm leaving home, but just going on a long vacation. I'd like to say that I'm nervous or excited, but right now I feel nothing. I guess I'm just slow at grasping things, and the feeling will wash over me tomorrow as I unload. I hope I don't have too much trouble adjusting and making friends. It helps a lot that I'm going to a geek school, so many people will have common interests.
As for this summer, I never got around to most of the goals I discussed earlier, but at least I got the important things done. As much as I would like to see a rocket vaporized in 10,000,000 volts of electricity, I'm glad I invested my time in the class directory. Since I allowed people to submit their own entires to the directory, it cut down on the work many fold, but it still took forever to set up and I spent a lot of time promoting it. The directory has totally surpassed my expectations, with over 120 entries, and I believe it will get quite a few more as more people head off to college. Hopefully I can send out yearly emails so people keep their info up to date but I imagine over time people will lose interest and the directory will die. But thats how life goes, people move on and make new friends or as the saying goes, .Friends comes and go, but enemies accumulate." Anyway the server is only good until 2038.
Probably my biggest regrets about the summer is that I did not hang out with enough people in my grade. Over the course of summer, not included AIM and email, I probably only talked to about 15 different people. During class week and graduation it never really hit me that it would be that last time I saw many of those people since I expected to see them over the summer, and I never got a chance to say goodbye to many. Although I am an introvert and tend to dislike large gatherings, I like individuals and there are a lot of people I'm going to miss. At one point in my life I wanted to become very outgoing and well liked. This was an important phase in my life, as it encouraged me to take risks such as run for student council and my social skills did improve. Unfortunately at that time I disliked myself for who I was and who I wasn't and was generally unhappy. Now I have found that you don't need to be extremely outgoing to be well like or respected and in the end, it is more important to win your own respect than other people's. After all you are the only person capable of making yourself happy or sad. I guess this was the most important lesson of high school, and hopefully it will serve me well in college.
On a totally different note, I wish I had spent more time this summer biking. I wanted to reach the 5,000 mile mark on my odometer, but partially because my bike was in the shop for a while, partially because I was busy, but mostly because I was lazy, I fell a few hundred miles short of that goal. I also didn't get to go for a really long, multi-state bike ride as I intended and my longest ride was slightly over 80 miles. Yesterday, however, I had a great time biking with Alex Czulak's dad and his Polish friend. I haven't biked in a group since last summer, and I was amazed by how much faster you can go when others are riding with you. A large part of it is physical, as the rider in front does block a lot of wind for those behind him, but their must be a physical aspect as well, because even when you're in front if feels as if the other rides are pushing you along. I think this is the reason we were about to bike such incredible distances last summer, and I've had trouble doing anything near them by myself. Although I originally got into biking for its peace and solitude, I hope that at Carnegie Mellon, I can find other people to bike with to share the experience and effort. Perhaps the only problem is that I have slow reflexes, and after my near death experience, I am afraid of following too close behind. I image though with some practice I'll be able to over come this and experience the group aspect of biking.
I guess that's all for now. I plan to continue writing here at least for the foreseeable future, whenever I feel like it, which is probably on a monthly basis. Of course my attitude could completely change, or I might not have the time to write and this could be my last entry. I hope this is not the case, as writing here is very good for therapeutics reasons and getting things off my mind. In any case, I'll probably be in Pittsburgh for the next four years, working hard, studying hard and hopefully having a lot of fun in the process. If you're ever in the area, drop by and I'll show you around. Until then, so long, farewell.